More than 30 seconds?

My brother recently commented that it only takes 30 seconds to read my blog. Have I been lacking substance? Too many pictures? (What? I like pictures.)

Maybe I am tired of words. Yes, I know I am a talker. (Go ahead. Laugh.) I write constantly. I think continually. And I talk. Constantly and continually. Put those things together and I arrive at disliking words.

I want to share those thoughts. I don't do all this thinking for nothing. Maybe you didn't come here to hear about God. Well, find another blog. I'm going to talk about God because I think about God about...80% of the day. Let's all remember, I am getting a degree about the Divine. Getting kinda tired of reading about my friends? That is about 7% of my thinking. The other 13% is consumed with family, future, and food. (I like food. I really like good food.) The future thoughts are starting to take up more and more time as graduation and the hopes of commissioning loom nearer and closer.

Maybe Photo Friday will be joined by Thursday Thought? Or Soapbox Sunday? These thoughts will consume me if I don't get them on paper...err screen. I am tired of words, but the words are not tired of me. This is the tension that I struggle with when blogging. I have substance. And I want my words to be worth more than 30 seconds.

Working on it.

BEAT

ps: These pictures are some highlights of my birthday dinner. Oh the laughter. And the trash talking. Plus the lovely kissing and hugging...and grabbing?

Sabbatical by Circumstances

Computer's sick. No blogging. (insert sad face) Well, not much blogging. Or viewing. (insert another sad face)

Will be back to a normal routine in about two weeks.

And yes, I do feel cut off from the world. Thanks to the creators and makers of Blackberry, I am not totally without contact.

Miss you. Miss me.
BEAT

Photo Friday: Which is my favorite?

Punky Brewster

at BEAT's oh-so-important Work Station

Nashville, TN

Circa 1985 Goodness

This is a tribute to the one and only LiLu.

(Skip down in the post. You will see.)

By the way, can you guess which figurine is my favorite?

Don't think because I am in Divinity School this is easy. I have priorities. Dressing as Jesus never won me a Halloween custom contest in college. Let's be honest. Nor did the Virgin Mary birth me. 

Punky Power,

BEAT

ps: One day I will share my real name. And then I will share where that names comes from. Let's just say the parents were willing to take the good and take the bad when they had me. 

Low on Words

Dearest Blog Buddies,

I have been low on words of late. Not that I don't have a thousand things going through my mind. Like how I am now meeting with the new president of my undergrad because I sent him a congratulatory email. I mean, he does live in Nashville. So the meet and greet is no stretch, but how do I get myself into these situations? Bright side? I get to reminisce about one of my favorite places on earth. I want to write about the recent email exchange with a professor. Didn't end well. I was a little hurt by his analysis of tradition...and some remarks he made about my tradition. Or I could go on and on about my email exchange withPeacebang. (Look back at the post about the blog who "comments" on clergy clothing.) Let's be honest, these were not just exchanges. They border on mini fights. Spats of sort. 

But I've been short on words. Let me get through the semester. And then I will still need a week. I write all the time. Paper after paper. Outline after outline. Word after word. Most days that is all I do...use words. So, once again I offer a little glimpse into my life through pictures. Not words. Good old visual stimulation. Enjoy. 

The below come from our end of the year dinner at school. Local grown food. Earth day theme. Art making. Beer drinking. Sustainable minded. Nothing says spring like flowers and beer. Oh yeah...and fellowship. I am part of one great community.

Low on words,

BEAT

Cakewrecks!

I got posted on Cakewrecks! I love this blog. Makes me laugh. 

Crazy,

BEAT

I wish I could...

I have some new favorite blogs. In particular, I heart Live It, Love it at this moment. She is my age with the same educational level, but very opposite in the way her live has unfolded. Yet, some way, her honesty reminds me of my self.  Honesty with humor and curse words and upfrontness that just can't be avoided no matter how hard you try. I am drawn to her writing/blogging style. Her "TMI Thursday" section will leave you laughing for hours...maybe even days. 

She responded to the following writing prompt (from Twenty Something Writers):

We all have something we want to say to someone. Maybe it’s someone in your life now. Or, maybe it is something you wish you said to someone who is no longer in your life. It could even be Mr./Ms. Random Person that you saw in the local coffee shop today. What do you want to say that you were never able to? You can leave the person(s) identity anonymous, if you’d like. Feel free to feature more than one person. Do it in letter form or any form you prefer. Show us that creativity!

I wish I had the gumption to do this. Since all my closest friends and family read this, even anonymous is hard. Really hard. This could easily lead to hurt feelings. I wonder if these few lines of ranting could lead to permanent damage. How would it end? Weighing that option causes me to not respond to the above prompt. 

We all have things we want to say to someone. Many someones. Many, many, many someones. 

But what is the goal? Transparent relationships? Openness? Loving truth?

Or does it result in me seeming better than you? Brutal honesty? Brutality? 

My words get me into trouble often. Often. My friends, yes they are still my friends, can tell you stories. Many accounts of how BEAT can't keep her trap shut. I've learned from many of these encounters. 

There are moments when truth telling must happen. When justice is being undermined. When compassion seems unimportant. When steam is coming out of your ears. Words must be used in these moments.  These words must be spoken to create reality. These words must come through the fog of the perceived to allow love to be known. 

That means that such words are not ranting.  They are for the common good of relationships, community, and the church. 

So, I have some things I've never said before. I want to write them here. But I'm not going to share them. They may be for the common good. Most likely, they are not. 

Keeping my trap shut...for once,

BEAT

Ps: Unless you are a person who uses the left lane on the interstate not for passing. It is the passing lane. Everyone say it with me, "The left lane is the passing lane."  Which means you most likely need to go above the speed limit. Above, not below. The goal is passing. People following this one rule of the road would cut down on my daily stress for sure. 

100?

The 100th post.

Don't get too excited.

This is my theme song of the week.

You can count on me...until it comes to an exam.

I never pull through. Not failure. But close. Darn close.

Here's to writing papers! Wait. Those aren't my favorite either.

Enjoy the music. Sing along. 

And thanks for reading with me. And entertaining me. Comments and such. Blogs and such.

I appreciate you. I can count on you. But me, you may not be able to count on me.

Love upon love,

BEAT

Beauty Guide?

So, you may think I'm kidding. I'm not. This lady has created a blog giving beauty tips to female clergy. She actually wants female clergy to submit photos of their Sunday outfits...and critique them. Really. No jokes. 

I think she is a pastor herself. Very funny. But it speaks some truth about challenges I continue to face in ministry. Who knew people cared so much what shoes I wear? How I style my hair? The length of my skirt? Whether I wear lipstick? Why I should wear lipstick?

I thought I would share. A good laugh. But just remember, this is my reality. Congregants and fellow clergy examine a female pastor's clothing and grooming habits, well, all the time. I say it frequently, but I can't get away with wearing the same suite every week. I can't just change my tie and look completely different. People remember what I wear. 

Open toe or no?

BEAT

Roll call?

Dearest friends,

Who are you?  I mean that in the nicest possible way. Promise. Nevertheless, my little stat counter at the bottom of the page tells me where you are from. I even have a map that pin points where you visit from. So cool, I know. Or creepy. You pick. 

But who are you? I know one person in England, but who are the others who visit me regularly from there? And from CA? And IN? And those few folks from FL? And those outside of Nashville in TN?

I just want to know you more. Call it curiosity. I love my little blogging community. You reduce my stress on a daily basis. More importantly, providing glimpses into other life experiences. So, thanks. Lots. 

Just requesting a roll call. Leave me a message. Let me know about your blog (especially, if I don't already read it often). 

Blog upon blog,

BEAT